Tag Archives: Weight loss

So, I have a major desire to write and do other worthwhile things, so why am I not doing them?

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SO, I do not know about you all, but I let things hold me back. I do work a lot, I run around somewhere all of the time and am constantly doing stuff for my hs senior, or spending time with her or BG or my cat. So it is easy for me to not make time for writing. Or exercise or church. I am sure you all can relate, today’s society, but particularly in America, and definitely on the East Coast is rush, rush, rush. So there is a bit of keeping up with what everyone around us is doing and the need to do it all, and quick! But in all honesty, I am avoiding the important things, and I think there is one common theme interwoven between them. Lack of true motivation, due to an underlying cause, pain and fear.

I am afraid to delve deep into what is hurting me so that keeps me from writing. Letting everything out will be like a waterfall and I just do not know if I am ready. And I also kind of have this fear of failure. Like what if I get my hopes up and nothing comes of my dream? What if I am fooling myself? What if this is not my intended path? It happened for so-and-so, but they are lucky, I never get a break, etc. I am a bit of a worrier sometimes and less of a risk taker, more than I would like to admit. Most people would say, how hard could it be to type out thoughts. It really is not when someone puts it like that, but there is an emotional aspect that constantly holds me back and I am trying hard to push through it. Self doubt and the lack of desire to deal with all of my feelings has been crippling my talent and withholding my gifts. I will not let this happen anymore. It is dumb and ridiculous and will make me live with regret if I do not just try. So, I am trying. I am typing now. I am reading more. I am carrying a notebook. So that counts for something! I am going to be one of those disciplined writers that other people aspire to be like, I just know it!:)

Church, wow. A place I spent a lot of time at from 2004 to 2016. My kiddo grew up going practically every Sunday. But then we met BG (Best Guy) and started going to visit him, or he would be here on Sunday, leaving only a few hours after church and was only here about 6 days a month, so church kind of fell by the wayside. And truthfully, I was tired of going there. I adore the pastor and still have a friend there that I care for, a lot. But the average age of members is 25 to 30 years older than me, so there was definitely no one there for my kiddo. And also, my mom died. When she would come to town, we went there every holiday together, and on regular Sundays too. It is hard for me to step back in there because of that. Dec 2019, my mom started going downhill and the last time we went to church there was that Christmas. Walking through there will be a flood of memories and people asking about her. I am not ready. But I feel that I have an obligation to go to church somewhere because I do not want my kid to lose her way with God, so I am going to find a place to visit. Soon! I have been searching for a while. Cannot wait to find a good fit for our family and to hopefully meet some great new people to be a part of our family friend group.

Working out. Hmmmm. I do not know what my deal is with this. About 6 years ago, I was in the best shape of my adulthood. I was walking about 40 miles a week, doing HIIT, eating clean and feeling great. I still was 40 lbs from my goal weight though. And no matter what I did, I could not lose more. Then early 2019 I hurt my ankle and found out there is a tear. It has held me back a lot. I do not know if my lack of exercise is due to fear of hurting myself more, or if I have just become lazy. But now, I am about 70 lbs from my goal weight, and tired and pretty out of shape at this point. I cannot even stick to a meal plan, though I do try. And I used to be so good. But part of the lack of effort is I think I have been in a 2 year depression. There is also frustration with my endocrine issues. I can go 100 percent, 7 days a week with few cheats, and barely lose what I should be losing. Between grief, injury, no thyroid and PCOS, I have been not into workouts regularly. But, I am excited, one of my clients is giving me a practically new exercise bike and delivering it. So I can put that in my room and I am sure it will be easier to motivate myself. That is a blessing that I will take advantage of!

God is good, he knows what I need and is providing those things without me even working hard to get them, and all in the last month!

BG bought me a new laptop for writing

A woman I met at a play, invited me to her church

I am getting handed an exercise machine that is not in my budget

If those are not signs, I do know what else to call them! What things do you struggle with? What is holding you back from doing them? Are you an excuse maker like I am? Have you delved into the WHY? I would love to hear from you all! Hit the subscribe button, and also email me- dee@simplydeeindc.com . I will be looking for your questions, suggestions and comments. We are all in this together! Share away!

~simply

Dee

So, I have decided to define “clean” and “fit” for myself…

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So, I am a size 12/14 and I am not super tall. Some would call me chubby, some say I look fab as I am and what others say, I don’t really care at this point because I eat better … Continue reading →

So, the words “fit” and “clean” are being used all over the place, but what do they really mean?

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So, fit and fitness are so over-used and over-hyped these days. Everyone is a fitness guru. There are thousands of people on every social media channel who have a different perspective or plan or sometimes scheme. The truth of the … Continue reading →

So, my daughter went to bed feeling bad about her weight, which made me not go to bed…

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So, I have a couple of health issues that make me “chubby”. That good ole endocrine system! In my case, it is rifled with issues. I am not the “fat girl”, but I am someone who has worried, struggled, watched their weight for 20 years. If I lose 25 pounds in one year as I did last year, the doctors will say: “Oh, that is so great! People with your issues (thyroid for one), barely lose more than a pound per month sometimes.” When keeping myself away from most carbs from a year, except for some fruits and vegetables, that is not what I want to hear. But, I have learned to accept it. I mean I could kick up my workouts. I have not done much of those since September. But every waking moment, I feel is taken up right now. So I do squats when i am at the stove. I take the stairs. I do leg lifts while unloading the dishwasher.

Anyway, my daughter has found herself about 20 pounds overweight. And, it all kind of snuck up on us. She is very tall, so it doesn’t show very well. But, when wearing certain things or trying them on, it is obvious that she has gained weight. What happened is that she went from 4 hours a week of physical activity minimum, to literally none. Being at different rehearsals 4 nights a week and having school work during the day has really hampered the physical activity. She does dancing on Wii when she can, but sometimes we sit and do 5 hours straight of school work and then I have to go do my afternoon job and then it is rehearsals. So, the weight has piled on in the last year and a half. And since she has gained 4-5 inches of height, it was not as noticeable.

And what stinks is, she eats healthier than most of her peers. We don’t do cereal, she eats oatmeal instead and she does not add sugar. We eat varieties of veggie burgers, she eats brown rice, and whole grains, and very little fast food. Like maybe a few times a month, and it is never McDonald’s and does not include fries. So bottom line is, she may have inherited my weight woes. I don’t know many kids that order sushi when they could get a junkier version of Japanese. Or, a child that is even willing to try like a chickpea burger, is pretty phenomenal in my book. Most of her friends eat Oreos and Cheetos and apple juice. I can’t believe people buy any of it, but Apple juice has more sugar in it than cookies! And, I don’t allow soda. So, starting today we are going to add at least 30 minutes of cardio everyday like we used to. During the summer and spring, it is usually a given. But from September until March, I think that is where a bulk of our issues with not exercising started. Play commitments, I was really sick for 2 months, and it was too cold to go for a hike or bike ride like we would normally do.

So, today, Pilates is on the menu. It was supposed to be ice skating in the city, but only God can control the weather. I am going to try daily to switch it up so that there is variety, we don’t get bored, and we have fun. I mean she is the kid who will do “Just Dance” 20 songs straight, but we have let life get in the way of physical fitness. We had to give up tennis and swim and all of that to commit to her love of acting. But if there is no physical fitness, then life will eventually become tough. So today, we will swim the sea of despair together. We will climb the mountain of time constraints, and take fitness on with our dukes up. I know my wording is a bit dramatic, but I found it kind of funny.:)

Though I have decent habits and eat organic and make very good choices, I can do better. I don’t have to have a chocolate meltdown and “that time” of the month. I don’t have to have that extra piece of organic turkey bacon. And, more importantly, I can make time to get us both into shape because my daughter models what she sees. I hope that whatever struggle or endeavor you are working towards, that you get off of the couch and start it today. Whether it is to write more, workout, eat better, call your mom more, scoop the cat litter more (me), just do it and do it with gusto! Many of us get in our own way when it comes to achieving our goals.