Wow, I have not written on here in almost 6 months to the date and I am ashamed, baffled and surprised at how much has transpired since I last wrote. I am now in a relationship with a great guy. IT has been official for a few weeks, but we have been dating/talking for over 2 months. He lives a few hours away, but we talk incessantly and have seen each other quite a lot. Being that I am a mother and have a full-time job now!!!:) I couldn’t have a more suitable relationship at this point in my life. I do wish he were closer geographically though.
So, what has happened in all these months? I stopped talking to the married friend of mine, altogether! The one who kept pressing me for more. I have been so naive this year, at least I was when it came to matters of men. I have learned soooooooooooooooooooooooooo much since then! I found someone who I thought was the one back in May (only because I had not had anyone in forever) and he ended it abruptly at some point in June because he wasn’t honest with me that he was dating someone else from the past that he wasn’t finished with. I yo-yoed back and forth with him up until mid-August when I met my boo. I shook the crappy men altogether mentally finally! All of the guys from the past are history!
Anyway, then there was another guy I dated for about a month,who was a boring and crazy control freak. And then I was been friends with a guy for a few months who is narcissistic and a little crazy, who I used to kind of date, but we have decided to just be friends. It’s kind of weird, but I stay in his life because he is good at his core. He is just hurting over a failed marriage. And now, I am with a great and sweet and caring and loving guy who puts me first! I have never had that before. It is a mutual admiration society between me and D.:)
So, about my kid. She is still doing online schooling even though I work away from home now. But it is happening with the help of one of my friends who home teaches, and she is with her dad one day, so it is all good. For now. I am enjoying my job and getting out and meeting some cool people, but I miss her. But not as much as I thought I would. I think it is because I felt her pulling away a little, so it helps me to have more of my own life too. But she is adjusting well to me being away, and we Snapchat and call each other and watch shows on Netflix together when I get home everyday.
I am obviously not writing a lot these days, but I am trying to return to it. This year has been a learning year. I have grown and been hurt and learned and been hurt and grown some more. I am embracing all of the good and bad about myself and putting up parameters in every relationship I have. I won’t allow certain things ever again, and there are things that I will allow because I must make some concessions for people if I want them to make them for me.
I vow to read more, write more, and I have the working out part down pat because I have to make a real effort now that I sit all day and commute. So, I am a work in progress and today I feel fulfilled. I feel that I have a lot of improving to do, but I am pretty satisfied with the woman I have developed into this year. I have been through so many downs and have cried and doubted myself, but I finally see the light and the rainbow and the pot of gold, etc.
I appreciate your patience as I have navigated my way through all of these crazy twists and turns. I look forward to continuing more of the journey with you all.
Sincerely and Simply~