So, I met some jerks. I lost an at home job. I started commuting 2.5 hours a day to a unfulfilling work situation. BUT…
I learned a lot
I have a job
I found the love of my life! No more creepy Match guys who are only looking for sex. No more roller coaster emotions. No more married men sending me messages on social media. No more dreadful dates! For the first time in my life, I have someone who I don’t have to play around with. I don’t have to wonder what he is doing or who he is with, because I know. He lives 3.5 hours away from me, but we see each other every weekend. We talk 4 hours a day and we send each other memes and texts and pics throughout the day. We know that we are going to spend our lives together and it feels magical.
It’s not fairytalish all the way though. He ended a very unhappy marriage a few months back, I am going through my divorce after 7 years of separation, I am not making enough money and have had car issues and financial problems, etc. But, we are already on the road to being life partners. We have been through some of those unpleasant but inevitable life issues and we are closer because of them. He is supportive to what I am experiencing and I am to him as well. This man, my man, talks about a future with me and we have plans. He doesn’t bolt or shiver or cower at the thought or conversation of a life together. He is a good man and wants and appreciates the good woman I am. He is the kind of partner I have always wanted. It took a long time, but I found true love.
The whole difference between this man and the boys I dealt with, is he loves everything about me. My crazy quirks and all and I love each and every one of his idiosyncracies as well. That is what makes a relationship, friendship or marriage work. Accepting the other person as they are. This is the first time that I have ever felt like I can’t live without a man versus I can’t live with them. Of course I have loved others before or at least thought I did, but after a while, there were more things that I disliked about them, than I liked. Lust or infatuation was the motivating factor and there was no solid foundation.
With my guy, it is totally different. We can spend 72 hours together and I want to cry as he leaves. I am the girl who gets tired of someone after a couple of days. The one who used to text back hours later. The one who didn’t always answer the phone. Or, I would pretend to be busy. But it wasn’t because I was a supreme game player. I was insecure in those relationships and I thought by doing those things, that it made me seem more interesting. But the truth is, no matter what I would have done, those situations would have never worked out because they weren’t for me. But D is. He is my everything and I am his. It took me a few decades to find true love, but at least it happened!
For the first time ever, as cheesy as you all may think this sounds, I feel complete. I have my daughter, I have my awesome guy and I feel content. I am supremely thankful to God for giving me all of the good things that I have in my life. Without God, my daughter and my relationship with my guy and others would not be possible. Because after all, God is love. I have so many blessings to count. I have good health. I have people who care for me whom I love in return. I have a nice and cozy place to live. Of course I want more, but what I have is enough. I don’t have the wealth, I want a better job, but I am rich in love and blessings and in the end, isn’t that all that matters?