Tag Archives: Humility

So, will beautifying the outside make a difference with a wonky inside?

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I am the weird, strange and odd kind of person that thinks deeply in situations that there is no obvious depth. A local grocery store that is one of the top in the nation decided to throw out all of their old front racks (for magazines, dvds and other wares) and use a deep and dark-colored wood to give the store an even more sophisticated look. And I suddenly thought, okay-the store looks better, but does this really improve the store? The store has more swanky touches, but how nice is the management? Does the company treat the employees the way that it once did when the owner of the store was alive?

See, a super mundane thing like shelf replacement makes me think about beauty on the inside versus the outside. I told you I’m weird. But really, are the ultra difficult workouts I am doing twice a day making me a better person? Stronger, maybe. More fit, I hope. A better shape to my body-here’s hoping.:) But if I did not work on myself spiritually, does any of that other stuff matter?

Well, in the world we live in today, it seems so. I don’t want to be one of those writing about the famous K family. But, if they didn’t have banging bodies and pretty faces, would people hate/love them in the way that they do? Though the question is purely rhetorical, I think you know the answer. NO! They look so awesome on the outside, but what goes on internally with some of them is really screwed up.

I can’t lie, I would love to have Kendall’s model figure and look great in everything. I would also like to not watch every bite that goes into my mouth and workout all of the time. But, genetics have a funny way of giving us the good, bad and the ugly stuff. I am attractive, but will never be modelesque. I am petite in height, and wear myself out measuring food and working out and drinking water to see minimal pounds lost.

The point is, I work so hard on the outside, but if I was a complete a-hole to people then I would not have people want to be around me. People wouldn’t want to celebrate my bday with me, or go see my daughter perform, or invite me to things. I am glad that I am good on the inside and that I do not act as though the world revolves around me. I pray and I am humble and I try to treat every one with kindness, until they piss me off.:)

So, as I sculpt my body with my 21 Day Fix deal and lift my weights and measure my portions, I will continue to ensure that what lies within rivals the beauty on the outside. For if the inside is ugly and tainted, then the outside, no matter how fit or gorgeous will just not be as beautiful.

I wish that more people could have this revelation or be convicted of this because looks do fade. It is a sad, sad circumstance for those that have lived their life letting their looks lead their way because once youth fades,the no one cares anymore. Then they are forced to have relationships based on their heart and mind.

Well, at least I have my heart and mind right. Just waiting for my body to be as fabulous! I will keep on trying one workout at a time. One pound at a time and one measurement at a time! Wish me luck!!

Simply~

Dee

So, I saw this hilarious book today and it referred to certain people as humble-braggers-Know one?

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I know this lady. She is kind in a syrupy way. She is genuine-I think. Well, she is a decent person, but I think when it comes down to it, she is out for she and her kid over anyone, but pretends to be a bend over backwards kind of person when she clearly is not. She embellishes a lot and boasts about how many opportunities her daughter has, but it is always important to stay humble.

She smiles in a contagious way and makes everyone she meets feel warm and fuzzy. She is the best person I have ever seen at making someone feel like whatever she is saying, is 100 percent from the heart, when her motives always seem to be to get them on her side in order to have a leg up on other people. She acts like she has super close relationships with anyone in charge.

She wants to be a person that knows more. She likes to act like she always knows what is going on when she clearly does not. She is a humble-bragger. When I saw this term in a book I instantly thought of this person. I can’t say that I hate her, or completely dislike her. But my daughter and I want to say things to her to compete with her in some way just to see how she will try to “one-up” us next.

I don’t understand why people like that are not called out more for their b.s. People have to know that she is not exactly down to earth, not when she is so sugary sweet with every word. People are not like that in real life. If they are, they have to be medicated.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am a good person. I can even be super sweet. But I am real, to the core. I can’t fake my feelings about a situation. I can’t pretend to be interested in people in order to get something out of a situation. Nor do I speak about every opportunity that I or my child are offered or have come across.

For one thing, I have learned that not everyone is happy for you. I have also learned that sometimes speaking about things will come to bite you in the behind. I let this person know about some opportunities for my child and lo and behold, she schmoozed her way into them too. Hence, I have to see and hear about her crap on a regular basis.

This weekend, we are going to an important gig that will give my kid great experience and also put her in front of some important people in the acting world. Guess who is going to the same place the first chance she gets? You guessed it-the humble-bragger. She will then tell everyone that her kid was personally invited and that Steven Spielberg was there and complimented her child and thought about doing a movie specifically for her child.

How do I deal with someone like this? The constant covert competition, embellishing and talking about how fabulous her kid is grating on my nerves, especially when her kid doesn’t take the craft seriously and cannot even carry a tune. I know it is not Christian of me, but I would love to read her and tell her the truth about everything. I would love to tell her to stop being delusional and to stop pretending that they are someone who they really are not. I want to tell her to stop discussing how important humility is when she doesn’t even begin to know what it means.

Sorry, I am venting tonight. This whole humble-bragger term was super funny when I saw it. But the more I think about this person and how transparent she is with her crap, the more I got annoyed.

Good night!

~Simply Dee

So, I went to visit a friend in Wilmington, Delaware for the weekend…

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I really had no idea how badly her life has turned until I visited. She moved to a neighborhood that is not very attractive or “her” at all. She has no car to drive, and is discouraged to use public transportation because her immunity is so low. For some reason her disability has not come in and she has been living off of selling baubles and luxury purses and other wares. She has a sh–load of nice things, so she could live off of her things for awhile. But she has been in the hospital 10 times in 15 months and one of the times was due to a stroke. I slipped 15 dollars in her purse, and took her out to eat twice and she was protesting the whole time. I also drove to a few stores and we did her grocery shopping and errands. But it was nothing, because that is what any person should do for a friend. This friend of mine is 20 years my senior, and she has a daughter my exact age who works 3 miles away and drives a Benz and is doing just fine who won’t even come over to take her to get food.

I had no freaking clue!! She is so humble and proud and didn’t want to tell me all of this because she said: “you are so happy”. I said, “I am happy, but if you had told me your real situation, I could help you to be more happy.” I told her some ways to cut costs, because she went from being upper middle class to having to move with her daughter, to then have to move to this random town home. I haven’t seen her since March because she doesn’t exactly live down the street and because she has been in and out of the hospital so much that I could not bring my daughter there because little kids aren’t allowed in ICU.

But also, I have been living my life and I feel guilty for not being there more. I am sure that I have could have found time or money to go and see her more. I have this super-duper friend guilt right now. So, I am already putting it on the books to go and see her again-soon. I realized how quickly someone’s life can change in a blink of an eye. It started making me think that though I am not rich like many of my friends are in the D.C. area and I don’t have a hubby caring for me like my friends do, I AM BLESSED. Truly blessed. We are healthy, we have a nice place in a nice neighborhood and we are happy and I have an income.

I wonder if all of these new money people driving around here in their 60-100 K cars would be able to fare if they had this happen to them. I don’t think they would live for a year. They have no clue what it is to struggle. Sitting in their million dollar homes, turning their nose up at everyone. If they became the people who they looked down on, they would not be able to live with themselves. Now I am not anti-one percent. Hell, all of the people that hate the top-tier only want to be them. And, my uncle is one of them. He drives a 100K car. He lives in a million dollar home. He takes private planes. But he works his ass off for it and doesn’t turn his nose up at anyone. He came from a farming town and had to go through a lot to get where he is.

I digress, but there are many people who gain money not from their families or building their own companies, but through good jobs or through their husbands. These are the new money people who act as if they have lived “high on the hog” (to quote my mom) their whole life. And another momism, “they didn’t have a pot to pee in and a window to throw it out of” when they were being raised up. Now, they act as if they are a part of the Vanderbilt clan. I sometimes see these kind of people and wish they could be brought to what my friend is having to deal with. I really do. Is that cruel? Does that make me a bad person? I know the whole eye for eye thing is wrong. But I just hate what has happened to my friend and so many people like her, and these other people have such bad attitudes and have it “going on”, well at least financially.

So, the gist of the story is I am humbled tonight. I am a little sad. I am a lot thankful. I want to ask God for forgiveness for my lack of appreciation. I want my friend to have better “luck”. I wish for happiness for her. I pray that her life will turn around and she will be on top for once. I also hope that I and others will realize how unimportant material items are. How time with friends and family and memories are so much more golden and valuable. Riches are not things you can see and touch always, love and happiness far outweigh all of that.

I want to be a better steward for my future and for my daughter. I want to buy less Starbucks and put more money into the bank. I am going to give more to my church and spend less at the movies. I am going to go and see loved ones and tell them more how much I care for them because in the end, love is all that matters…