Category Archives: Blogging

So, am I the only one that doesn’t like to admit when they screwed up?

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I still have a hard time admitting when I am wrong. Not in a prideful way like if I bet on a basketball bracket, or if I say that a certain actor was in a movie, and it was someone else. I am talking about admitting wrongdoing when I think that there will be repercussions that could cost me my job, or someone’s opinion of me. Since I am an adult, I should not be afraid of saying I screwed up, but I kind of am.:)

Take today for instance, I let a client file slip through the cracks and now we owe them money. It was an innocent mistake, because honestly I have not had training at all in the position that I am doing. But, I should have done checks more often or had a better system of doing things. I let my boss know that we owe money and it is my fault, but I kind of blamed the insurance company as well so I would not have to take complete credit for screwing up.

That is probably a bit childish, pathetic or just straight up dishonest, but I don’t like to disappoint people. I don’t like to make them think that I am not dependable or competent. I don’t want to embarrass myself either. So, I am going to either have to start being perfect in all that I do or have to “man” up and tell the complete truth.

It can’t be that difficult, right? I have managed to clean eat for almost 3 months(which is a major miracle!), I moved over 600 dollars away from home with no friends to DC, I stand up to people who some people would be fearful of and never let people walk over me.  So surely I can just suck it up when I fail and lay everything on the line. At least I hope so?

So, I am thankful to be born here. For the people that aren’t, I don’t understand…

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This is a patriotic post, so if you aren’t a patriot, don’t read or comment if you don’t like the U.S. I know that our country has a scandalous past and a rocky history. But have you ever known of any country to be perfect? This whole anti-Columbus day business and flag burning in the U.S. is crap. I am not proud of a lot of things that have happened, but I am proud of so many things that did. I am so proud of our soldiers. Don’t agree with the wars? Blame the world leaders. Including our president. But please be supportive of those who have died and fought for our precious freedoms.

Like the gay marriage legislation? Hate it? Either way, we have freedoms in this country that people die because of in the middle east. Being gay here has not been easy for folks. But being gay in middle east means dying. Interracial marriage was banned here for so long, but marrying outside of one’s race or religion does not happen everywhere. In many cultures, you are forced to do what a minority of people say is right and that is what is great about our country. It may have taken a long time for things to turn around in regards to discrimination, but life is better here in the U.S. except for Christians.

I get so sick of people saying what the Christians did during the Crusades was so terrible. But as a whole, Christians have not done anything close to that in a very long time. KKK? They do not count as Christians, so don’t bring that up. But there are mass killings all over the world in the name of religion and no one says a word about it. But Christians are terrible, and Americans are greedy. What is happening in so many countries right now is frightening and deplorable, but people still complain about our great nation?!

Well, there is always a way out of here. There are many that love this country that would be happy to move here and take the place of those ridiculous people who think that our history is shameful and disgusting. It isn’t sparkly and white and unblemished, but we are a nation of compassionate and giving people. We have thousands of fire fighters, police officers and soliders and teaches who have changed the lives of countless people who have shaped this country. There are always bad politics or people in every part of the world and in every situation. But from where I am standing, I think that we have it pretty good here.

All I can do is pray for our leaders whether I care for them or not. I can pray that our country is not taken over by the religious intolerant and that with the new president, comes good things. Happy 4th to you all. God Bless everyone, and especially those who risk life and limb so that we can type however we feel about anything on to these pages without fear of persecution.

Simply~

Dee

So, why don’t I practice what I preach some of the time?

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I think it is because I am blessed with the gift of great intuition. I am also blessed with a heck of a lot of common sense. But today when I told my friend that she needs to cut some of the ties with her mom because she in her 40’s, I suddenly felt like a hypocrite. My mom has to help pay my rent sometimes. I have to pay her back and borrow more money from her at this time of my life than I did in my 20’s. The main reason being that I have a child and work from home, making less to spend more time with my daughter. I am constantly praying and proclaiming and trying to make more money. But it’s not like I am not working as much as I can or not like I did not get and education so that I could make my situation better.

This particular friend hasn’t tried to make things better. She takes every one of her mom’s calls. She lets her mom tell her what phone to get, she lets her mom make plans for her. She explains to her home mom why she is going somewhere and with whom she is going. She complains constantly about it and is like a major victim regarding their relationship. I may not be successful or wealthy, but I am a doer. I try to change my situation. I try to have healthy relationships and try to work out more and eat better. I don’t shove an ice cream cone in my mouth while complaining about my weight. I just don’t freaking eat it! But some people just do not have the confidence or the know-how to make their lives better. Maybe that is the difference?!

As much as I feel like a jerk or worse a liar in some situations, I am never a victim. I may have a cry a few times a year about my situation, I do lean on my mom from time to time, but then I pick myself up and pay her back and do what I can to not have to borrow in the first place. But I also cut corners financially speaking, I don’t eat out anymore or rarely, I don’t waste money, and I have tremendously cut down on our entertainment expenses. But anyway, I don’t need to preach if I am not living my life in a perfect way. Instead, maybe I need to help my friend(s) to think and act like a strong person who all has it figured out.

I truly try to give no advice. I want to keep my opinions to myself. But, it just comes right out when I see someone being wronged or treating themselves badly. I don’t know if it is a personality flaw or a gift. But I think instead of attacking the person or situation that is making them into the victim, I will work on more empowering. Sometimes I want them to understand how much I care about their feelings or I want to show empathy and I go a bit overboard in what I say or how I react. I try to be a good friend at the core of it all. Now being a true friend is something I can preach about because I rock:)

Night!

Simply~

Dee

So, today was a roller coaster kind of day. But all is well…

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We started the day early so we could catch another round of the DC Shields playing FDNY at George Mason University after getting an oil change. Well, the oil change turned into 450 dollars! I so did not have the money, so I got the oil change and tire patched and new wiper blades and went to the game anyway and cheered as if I was not stressed about dollars yet once again! Good news is that DC beat NY and we had fun. So I go home and texted a friend to see if I could borrow her car to take 3 of the kids I sit for and my daughter to an amusement park tomorrow. She wasn’t into it. So, I felt really bad about it but had to email the 2 families while they were at work today to tell them my dilemma. I knew they wouldn’t be mad because a tie rod issue is so very important and my car could have really been in an accident if I had not had it checked out.

So, I came home and slept because I was so upset about letting people down who had spent over 40 dollars per ticket and trying to figure out how to come up with 336 extra dollars. One of the mom’s was nice enough to offer her car, or to pay for half of a rental. I thought that it was sweet. But then I still had the issue of not being able to fix my car. So, I realized I had 70 dollars credit left on one car credit card and 70 dollars on another card. I had money in the bank, but I was afraid to spend it all because I don’t like to have empty pockets when driving 150 miles round-trip. Long story short, my friend let me borrow the 170 until I get one of my 3 checks at the end of the week.

The moral to this long drawn out story is, I never gave up. I knew it would work out. Even though I slept it off for a couple of hours, I did not panic or cry. I went to the second basketball game and watched DC Shields beat the DC Snipers. I took my friend to Starbucks and then I went and printed my tix for amusement park. I got my car fixed, not only because I put good out there and so good comes to me (most of the time), but because somewhere deep inside I know that God will take care of me. I do not have the big house, or a husband taking care of me but I always squeak by. I am not going to lie, I am sick of barely making it financially. but God always provides. Whether a friend comes along to help me or I get to work extra hours I make it somehow. I can owe that to God. Every. Single Time.

So, all in all today was good. My car is good as new. Kind of.:) I have packed all of our snacks and made our lunches and am preparing breakfast so it can be heated up in the morning. All is well! Now on to making more money. I am going to keep plugging away with this faith thing and I know that greater days are ahead!

Night and hope that you have faith in bad times, not only when times are grand.

Simply~

Dee

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So, we have spent 2 entire days watching the 2015 Fairfax World Police and Fire Games

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I will have to say that the games are quite phenomenal. Granted, we only went to opening ceremony and the rest of our time has been dedicated to basketball, but it has been impressive. Greece and Israel play straight up street basketball. I would never want to make those police officers angry if in their country. They are scrappy to say the least. Australia is an awesome and beautiful place, but basketball is not their sport. The 2 games we saw, they lost by at least 50 points. And Greece, they are very good actors when it comes to playing ball. They fake get hit or tripped to force the other team to get a foul. They play dirty ball. Hong Kong is surprisingly good! This has been such a fun experience going to all of these games for free! It’s like the olympics are in town and it is not breaking the bank. There are over 50 sports, so after b-ball finals on Tuesday, I will be reporting on the next sport I am obsessed with until the games end on July 4th.

And lastly, I am so proud of my DC shields team. They are really on point and holding their own. It has been 20 years since I have been this into basketball. But it is fun seeing people in your community that are protectors, show their stamina and power against other powerful protectors. There is a sense of pride too that comes with knowing that the police in our area are not only good at their jobs, but talented in other areas as well. DC police have 2 more basketball games tomorrow, and after my car checkup, we will be right their cheering. There are a lot of people we know that are not interested in these games and I don’t get it. There is so much value in going to not only community events, but multi-cultural and worldly events because there is always something valuable to learn.

Well, enough of sports talk, which is not usually a part of my repertoire. So, I am more all over the place than usual.:)

Good night

Simply~

Dee

How do you feel about SCOTUS decision about gay marriage?

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For me, it is simple. I don’t have anything against gay people. Yes, I am Christian, but who am I to judge? I have a gay family member, I have a friend who is gay. It is all good. I am just worried about the fact that life long appointed judges can force state governments to do what they deem correct. So, should people focus on their own needs and desires, i.e, gay rights versus our government taking over constitutional rights while our eyes are closed because of distractions? Maybe after the smoke and dust have cleared, people will realize that the US government is beginning to mirror actions of governments that many have considered not so scrupulous.

Good night~

Simply Dee

So, night time is quite rough for me, but the day and sunshine can make all of the difference

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When I am alone at night and it is so quiet, I seem to get bothered with everything. It’s like the weight of the world is standing on my chest at night. I feel alone and pathetic and troubled. Not that I don’t have my issues, but life is quite good. Though it is so cliche’, all is right with my world when the sun is shining and the birds are chirping. I am jovial and positive and I feel good about myself.

I understand now why in movies there is the dark figure that is evil and the bright figure that is good and pure. As Olivia Pope says: Wearing the White Hat. Not that when one feels down they don’t wear the white hat, but when I feel down and low, I think down and low. Everyone aggravates me. Nothing goes right. I find that this is generally the case when I have too much time alone, or when I am sitting and pondering the world, my world, when many people are fast asleep.

So, right now I have a good outlook. I feel accomplished today. We bought a lot of supplies for my daughter’s party in November. I know, a long time away but if I explained all we had to make then it would make sense. I filled my car with gas. I had a 30-minute conference call for work. I took my daughter and a kid I care for to pottery. I dropped that kid off and picked up a child for another family I keep and now the kids are playing. I am planning dinner, going to turn on Netflix. Today was productive! and try later on to not get the darkness envelop my being and torment me. But instead use my sunny day thinking and get some good old-fashioned rest. (Here’s hoping!)

My biggest challenge is to try later on to not let all of the darkness envelop my being and torment me. But instead, use my sunny day thinking and get some good old-fashioned rest. (Here’s hoping!) Hopefully whatever you have on your mind or to-do list, you can turn it off when you lie down tonight. I am beginning to think that this whole sleepus interruptus thing is a culprit in my weight not budging!

Simply~

Dee