So much has happened in the last year. I tried dating and failed. I went out into the work force and failed. My car broke. My ex took me to court for custody and visitation. But, I have started working again for myself and though not where I need to be financially, I am happier because I see my child all day again. About my kiddo, she will be in this amazing 8 week day camp that I got her a scholarship for to hone her acting skills. I will miss her, but she is excited. And, she starts real school in the fall, which is a heartbreaker. But I will get through it. I pray. Only because of her excitement alone. So changes, galore!!!
But, I left out this most major super-duper fantastical thing ever. I am with the love of my life. My 3rd heartbeat. My daughter is my 2nd heartbeat.:) He is my best friend, super understanding of my ridiculous divorce stuff, great with my daughter and I never get tired of him. No really! I don’t! That is a big deal because I have been alone for 8 years and am so used to doing my own thing. I can’t wait to get this divorce so I can wear his ring and be his wife and have our fabulous little family.
It kind of sounds crazy coming out of my mouth or in this case, out of the keyboard because I have never felt this way. I have never loved anyone this much. We are truly best friends. I feel comfortable telling him my hopes, dreams, fears, basically anything. I have been through such an emotionally challenging time and he has been right there for me. It is the first time that it has been flawless with someone. It is amazing.
And, scary at the same time. I am so happy and so fulfilled and so at peace. So, I worry. About everything!!! I really try not to, but I worry about having skin cancer, or about basically anything under the sun because I am not used to having a good relationship. We were talking about getting married November of 2018, but now we are talking April. I have never been this sure about someone in my life. I would marry him tomorrow if I could.
It’s funny because I have always wanted love. I have taken a stab at it a time or 2 or 3 or 20 times and it did not go so well for me. I always settled. Kind of like when I vote for president, I just go with the lesser of 2 evils. That is how dating has been for me, I just go with the decent choice, but I am never happy. So, when my guy came along out of nowhere and spoke to me on social media, I just assumed he would just be another guy like all the others.
I am so so glad that I gave him the chance and replied to his message. That one small gesture has forever changed my life. I am not trying to be cliche’, but I can’t imagine a day of my life without this man. I would walk through fire, climb the highest mountain and protect him with all that I have. Sound crazy? Well, maybe you are right, but I am happier than I have ever been and no one can change that!