Tag Archives: Blessings

So, what is grace really? And not the grace you may be thinking of…

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So, I am not talking about grace in the way that Madonna talks about it: “She’s got style, she’s got grace, Rita Hayworth gave good face…” (Vogue) I am talking about the Grace of God. Have you ever seen books about Grace in a Christian reference of the word?

I mean, I think that I know what “they” mean, meaning authors and pastors and other church going folk. But, I am not exactly sure how to be granted or how to get or receive or whatever terminology goes along with this holy GRACE.

So, I went to this website called allaboutgod.com. This is what I found:  Definition of God’s Grace – How do theologians define it?
“What is grace? In the New Testament grace means God’s love in action towards men who merited the opposite of love. Grace means God moving heaven and earth to save sinners who could not lift a finger to save themselves. Grace means God sending His only Son to descend into hell on the cross so that we guilty ones might be reconciled to God and received into heaven. ‘(God) hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin, that we might be made the righteousness of God in him’” (2 Corinthians 5:21).1

So, I read that and thought, well duh-I knew that. But then it means= wow!!! I am falling short of deserving this Grace from God! So, I read some more and the synopsis was that it is God’s favor. I suddenly realized that perhaps I don’t seem to get anywhere in life, in the way that I would like is because I don’t fully appreciate this gift and privilege I have been given, called Grace. Then I wonder how in the heck I am worthy? Or, maybe I am not? Maybe my lack of faith, or concentration in regards to Christ is the reason I often feel stuck in different areas of my life?

I really want to turn a new leaf and try to accept and inhale and grow in God’s Grace. I am going to work to not take it for granted and especially since I have been armed with the knowledge (again) how awesome and extraordinary the gift of God’s son so that I can live is beyond words. I want to revel in it and know that with God’s Grace I can make it through everything and when I am an old person, I will truly understand what the hymn Amazing Grace really means.

Because if any of us are honest with ourselves, we are blessed beyond measure and don’t even realize how much so. We woke up today, we are reading a blog right now. As large as Grace is, so is the fact that we have life and often live it how we want not considering God in the many choices we make, yet God still has our back. That pure and unconditional love itself explain Grace at its core.

simply~

Dee

 

Image courtesy of musicblvd.com

So, I have decided to focus on the positive in this world full of negative…

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Today, I am so happy and blessed and ecstatic to be alive. There are people all over the world who did not have that luxury today. There are people within the last week who have lost their lives, or the lives of their loved ones to these terrorists cowards. Heck, it happens everyday all over the world.

So, today I want to live in thankfulness and gratitude. I am thankful to have the heat on and be underneath the covers. I am blessed to have just eaten my chicken sausage, kale and almonds combo and more food at my disposal.

I am happy that I am actually seeing results on my long, long weight loss journey. I am so grateful to have met my ex-husbands’ ex-girlfriend:) who had similar weight loss struggles and see her lose so much weight. She inspired me to become a Beachbody Coach and introduced me to 21 Day Fix!

Of course, I am thankful for my daughter. She colors and lights my world. WIthout her, my life would be blehhhh to the 100th power. And speaking of not making it without her-my mom. She can be a huge pain and is set in her ways, but she is my best friend besides my daughter. I should tell her that sometimes.

Last but not least. Definitely not least. My spiritual life. I am not religious. I am more like a reverent person. I follow Christ. I do not do a great job of imitating Him, but I know through him is eternal life and peace. I am working on the peace part. I am also working on being around people that can only bless me in my journey, not hinder me or it in any way.

I encourage you all to focus on what is good. Even if it is just for today. Or even if it seems totally impossible to do so, there is good in this world. It may seem hard to find, but there is more good than evil. But it’s akin to dropping one drop of oil in water-it changes everything.

Whether you are religious, spiritual, a non-believer or however you may identify yourself, if you are here today there is a reason to be grateful. Blessing and love to you all.

Simply~

Dee

So, Thanksgiving is coming up and I am thankful…

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I don’t have oodles of cash. I don’t have a big, fine house. I don’t have a “big job”, but I am thankful and happy every single day. I have a friend/trend who buys her way into people’s hearts. She has not one friend that she hasn’t spent lots of money on at one time or another. She is a nice woman, but she would not be the person that she is without her nice income.

So many people define themselves and their lives by their status, the number of stamps on their passports, or how often they get pampered at the spa. I wonder how they make it if they made 30 grand a year. Or if they rent instead of own. Or, if they did not have a boatload of people to hang out with at a moment’s notice.

I have spent much of my life being mediocre. (It kinda sucks because I am actually quite bright and creative and fabulous) Making mediocre money, going mediocre places, and living a life that could have been so much bigger. But then came my kid. I have done the whole mom/child-rearing thing in a big way. I am a super, fabulous mom and  a lot of people envy-no joke. I wouldn’t trade all of the memories on vacations with flashy friends for the awesome journey I have had and continue to have with my kid.

I look at my child everyday, and realize what a gift I have been given by God. I yell, I get annoyed, I may not cook all of the food groups on a regular basis, but I am present. I have traditions with my kid. I make occasions more than special. I treat every birthday as a royal occasion, planning for 4 or 5 months sometimes like her recent party.

But, one doesn’t have to have a child to see and feel God’s love and blessings. Having a great and rewarding career is something to be thankful for. I have never had that. Having a great relationship with your family, or friends that would go to the ends of the earth for you is something that most  of us don’t have. Being really athletic and fit and inspirational to others is a blessing to count for sure!

My whole point in all of this, is that people die everyday. There are monsters creating terror all over the world everyday. So everyday we are alive and haven’t lost anyone is a day to praise God and celebrate. I have decided to not ever put myself into a relationship, or a job or in a situation any more where I am not valued or I do not feel happy. I want to look back when I am old and realize that I did not waste my time on unimportant issues or people.

During this beautiful and hectic and magical holiday season. Don’t fret. Don’t feel sad. Know that there are many people out there that would love to have the life that you do. IF you ever feel that you are short on blessings, know that your ability to read this blog and other blogs and have access to technology and have the ability to  write is a right or a privilege that many people across the world do not have access to.

What are you thankful for this year?

Simply~

Dee

So, joys and concerns before the day closes…

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My joys would be:

We both woke up today.

Actually my mom and cat did too, so yay!!

I got up and went to work today with the kiddos even though I coughed all night.

I am feeling better.

We went to a bakery supply store and bought some cool items to bake all of the treats for my daughter’s party in November, for really cheap-at cost!

I cleaned up and talked to loved ones.

I got some work done.

I wrote in my blog!

I got my 2 miles in for the day at 1 am:)

Concerns:

Need more money.

Seems like there is more to be grateful for than to be concerned about. Try to list yours out, even in private. There is a lot more to be happy about than we think. Even little things like getting cheap cake pop sticks:) Life is to be celebrated.

Good night!

Simply~

Dee

So, does it feel like everyone is moving forward in their lives while you aren’t evolving one bit??

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For me it does, a lot lately. With all of this down-time this month, I have had a lot of time to think. And sometimes, too much thinking time is not a good thing. At least not for me!

I had a conversation with  my daughter today and she was saying how she was tired of wearing dresses and skorts all of the time and it was time to change her style. I felt instantly like my little girl is growing up so much. I mean we were around a girl 2.5 years older than her all day, so I am sure that her style had something to do with my daughter’s sudden change in style after choosing to wear a dress yesterday. But then I thought about how hard I have struggled with my weight and after 20 lb loss it is not moving. To be honest, over the years I have never been able to get far beyond those 20 lbs. I know I have thyroid problems, but 20 pounds when there is 40 to 45 more to go, is just a drop in the bucket.

But then I thought about how hard I have struggled with my weight and after 20 lb loss it is not moving. To be honest, over the years I have never been able to get far beyond those 20 lbs. I know I have thyroid problems, but 20 pounds when there is 40 to 45 more to go, is just a drop in the bucket. It gets a little frustrating when I even let my bff coffee go just to get healthy and eat clean and still nada!

Then I started thinking about our cute little place is and how I would love a bigger place and the fact that I have now been here over a decade. How, I still can’t afford a home and that the jobs I keep applying for do not happen for me. Then I realized in less that 10 years my kid will be ready for college and I have a very small life without her. I am not really complaining, because most of my friends are in the same stage of life that I am and child-rearing is #1. But many of them have spouses to cling to as the little birdies begin to fly away. I only have one birdie, and I am beginning to feel like I am stagnant and later may be alone. But I do not want to date. I want God to bring someone into my life because I suck at choosing. But wondering when/if that is in the cards is another thing I am curious/anxious about.

I am saying all of this because I took 2 part-time gigs hauling kids around for the same families I worked for 2 summers ago. Even with all of my degrees, I am not too proud to make money in ways that may not fit my education. So as I was listening to the kids chatter today as we did different activities, I realized that I am still doing the same kind of work, living in the same place, holding on to the same weight and everyone is evolving. Kids I cared for 2 summers ago are now going into the last years of middle school. My kid is not early elementary anymore, so it seems a bit strange still caring for kids than it did when she was 3 or 4 or even 2 years ago.

I’m not complaining, I am just ready for my abundance. For positive changes to come into my life in the form of a better body because I work so hard now, and watch every bite and get my workouts in and it is a snail’s pace. I want a good job. I want to feel that I am growing and prospering as a person. I also would love to grow and prosper as a Christian. A kind friend on here said that perhaps I am stuck in a stage and I will eventually pull through but I have to learn things from that stage. I am tired of learning and treading water and doing nothing phenomenal or outstanding.

I can give myself a gold star for parenting 95 percent of the time, but beyond that, who am I? What am I? I can’t believe at this age I am still confused and not where I want to be. But I can say one thing for certain, if I wasn’t a mom to this wonderful girl, I would not be half of the person I am today. She is the best blessing I have had in my life thus far. I don’t know if there is a blessing that can outweigh the love and happiness I have being her mom.

But it doesn’t mean I don’t want to evolve. To be better. To make more money. To not be so stressed. I am crossing my fingers, eyes, toes and ankles that my time will come soon. Then I won’t only have a fab daughter, but a fab rest of my life to go along with her.

Simply~

Dee

Image courtesy of lilpickmeup.com

So, I forgot how much I loved rainstorms until now…

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So, I read a chapter of Harry Potter to my daughter along with a Psalm and she went to bed after 11 which is way too late. But it was perfect timing. I fixed myself and kale stir-fry snack with almonds, and as soon as I sat down to watch Gilmore Girls, the thunderstorm started. People that are from the midwest and out west, often freak out when there are major thunderstorms, but us East Coasters can relate to them and some of us even feel at ease when they start up.

Rain is one of my favorite things ever. Besides, chocolate and Sound of Music and my kid and love and Seinfeld and cats (do not worry, I will not start singing Favorite Things). For me, rain is a chilling out period. The soothing sound makes me want to grab a book out of the large stack of books to read and read all day. When it is hot, it nourishes everything and refreshes. At night, it is so nice to open the patio door and have the ceiling fans on and just listen and snuggle up under a summer throw. It is almost the same effect for me as it is when I listen to waves crash. Nothing can replace the feeling I get when I hear the sounds of the beach, but rain is a close 2nd. Once I ran around half-dressed with a boyfriend late at night as a joke/dare. I have stamped in it, and splashed in it and danced in it. The rain is cathartic for me on an uneventful Saturday night, or at any time.

Maybe I am in the minority in being a lover of precipitation, but if you don’t light up when the wet stuff drops out of the sky, give it another chance. Take a deep breath, close your eyes, pray or meditate and soak it up (not literally-haha). Take out a journal, or a recorder or your laptop and write or speak your thoughts or just be still. Take time to realize what a blessing and a gift it is, rather than a slippery hindrance. It is all about perspective my friends.

Simply~

Dee

Cover photo courtesy of picjumbo.com

So, I went to visit a friend in Wilmington, Delaware for the weekend…

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I really had no idea how badly her life has turned until I visited. She moved to a neighborhood that is not very attractive or “her” at all. She has no car to drive, and is discouraged to use public transportation because her immunity is so low. For some reason her disability has not come in and she has been living off of selling baubles and luxury purses and other wares. She has a sh–load of nice things, so she could live off of her things for awhile. But she has been in the hospital 10 times in 15 months and one of the times was due to a stroke. I slipped 15 dollars in her purse, and took her out to eat twice and she was protesting the whole time. I also drove to a few stores and we did her grocery shopping and errands. But it was nothing, because that is what any person should do for a friend. This friend of mine is 20 years my senior, and she has a daughter my exact age who works 3 miles away and drives a Benz and is doing just fine who won’t even come over to take her to get food.

I had no freaking clue!! She is so humble and proud and didn’t want to tell me all of this because she said: “you are so happy”. I said, “I am happy, but if you had told me your real situation, I could help you to be more happy.” I told her some ways to cut costs, because she went from being upper middle class to having to move with her daughter, to then have to move to this random town home. I haven’t seen her since March because she doesn’t exactly live down the street and because she has been in and out of the hospital so much that I could not bring my daughter there because little kids aren’t allowed in ICU.

But also, I have been living my life and I feel guilty for not being there more. I am sure that I have could have found time or money to go and see her more. I have this super-duper friend guilt right now. So, I am already putting it on the books to go and see her again-soon. I realized how quickly someone’s life can change in a blink of an eye. It started making me think that though I am not rich like many of my friends are in the D.C. area and I don’t have a hubby caring for me like my friends do, I AM BLESSED. Truly blessed. We are healthy, we have a nice place in a nice neighborhood and we are happy and I have an income.

I wonder if all of these new money people driving around here in their 60-100 K cars would be able to fare if they had this happen to them. I don’t think they would live for a year. They have no clue what it is to struggle. Sitting in their million dollar homes, turning their nose up at everyone. If they became the people who they looked down on, they would not be able to live with themselves. Now I am not anti-one percent. Hell, all of the people that hate the top-tier only want to be them. And, my uncle is one of them. He drives a 100K car. He lives in a million dollar home. He takes private planes. But he works his ass off for it and doesn’t turn his nose up at anyone. He came from a farming town and had to go through a lot to get where he is.

I digress, but there are many people who gain money not from their families or building their own companies, but through good jobs or through their husbands. These are the new money people who act as if they have lived “high on the hog” (to quote my mom) their whole life. And another momism, “they didn’t have a pot to pee in and a window to throw it out of” when they were being raised up. Now, they act as if they are a part of the Vanderbilt clan. I sometimes see these kind of people and wish they could be brought to what my friend is having to deal with. I really do. Is that cruel? Does that make me a bad person? I know the whole eye for eye thing is wrong. But I just hate what has happened to my friend and so many people like her, and these other people have such bad attitudes and have it “going on”, well at least financially.

So, the gist of the story is I am humbled tonight. I am a little sad. I am a lot thankful. I want to ask God for forgiveness for my lack of appreciation. I want my friend to have better “luck”. I wish for happiness for her. I pray that her life will turn around and she will be on top for once. I also hope that I and others will realize how unimportant material items are. How time with friends and family and memories are so much more golden and valuable. Riches are not things you can see and touch always, love and happiness far outweigh all of that.

I want to be a better steward for my future and for my daughter. I want to buy less Starbucks and put more money into the bank. I am going to give more to my church and spend less at the movies. I am going to go and see loved ones and tell them more how much I care for them because in the end, love is all that matters…