I’m drowning in disbelief.
The queen of my story is gone.
Never to return until the ethereal event in the sky.
My reason for being and my reluctant best friend.
At times we seemed like foes, the ties were superhuman.
A true ally in my life won’t be a part of my daily.
I drown in sadness and disbelief as I type.
The last real conversation was about her shoes.
The only real angel I’ve ever known, and we can no longer chat.
The regrets are huge but I did all I could to save her.
Hundreds upon of hours in hospitals lying side by side.
Where she took her last breath was beautiful and peaceful but not good enough.
Her giving/loving nature and straight upness charmed everyone.
I long to be that person, unruffled and refined.
Ceremonially unbothered though many storms brewed beneath.
The goofy and funny person she was with class to boot.
From her drawl to her gait, she was one who broke the mold.
I wish I would have realized before how utterly amazing she was.
Though grown, I was still her kid and took her for granted I’m sure.
But the love given back to this wonderful being was unmotivated and pure.
I hope that besides loss and pain I will gain her innate joy and jovialness.
She never met a stranger or saw a baby she didn’t make smile.
This amazing and complex being was my mom.
Though I cannot see her face, her memory is forever etched in my soul.
G.K. -the brave, the powerful, the strong.
My mother, my confidante my all.
May, 29, 2020