So, I finally left that freaking wretched place. Last year this time I was talking about not using my brain enough and now it is too much! I am just wanting to be at a place where people APPRECIATE how hard I work and leave me to it.

Is that possible or even probable regarding work? Do people ever have days filled with happiness when they are giving their all to make other people rich? Working with animals or children, there is at least reward in the work. But the reward with a role working 55 plus hours a week with no flexibility? The greedy overlords buying more peoperty .

I am finally about to get my happy on! D said that a workplace or any place can’t dictate happiness, but I beg to differ. It can definitely affect one’s personality and one’s life as many hours that are spent there. It turned me into a sleepy and grumpy, unhappy person a lot of the time. I was like a walking representation of some of the 7 Dwarves:)

To go back to doing freelance and nanny work and pet sitting which make me happy, although I am making less money, seems worth it. I couldn’t fathom staying one more minute in a unhealthy place that had 4 HR people since April. A place where lies are made to keep employees from communicating with one another.

The owners were on travel 4 months out of the 12 months I was there. And they came in at 12, or not at all! The communication style was not communicating and rewards were nonexistent. It was such an unprofessional work environment and not for me, especially with dysfunction on every level. You get the point, toxicity times a mil.

The admin of 2 years is leaving this week. I left last week and I give the new HR person a few months and she will be out. So yeah, kinda unstable environment that I am now free of! Hallelujah!!

Life is so short and the job was affecting me long after quitting time and even on weekends. To me, 12 months of not being happy was just 12 months too long. So, I went on an interview and asked a few questions about flexibility. Based on the way body language was, I could tell that despite what was said on the phone, being flex was not a part of this guy’s vernacular.

For the first time ever probably, I chose me. I chose my feelings and thoughts and needs. And turned it down though I desperately wanted to leave my job. This is the thing-if you met me, as a few of you have, I am often outspoken and exude confidence. But inside, there is a nagging feeling of inadequacy or self consciousness.

The lack of belief in myself has always been right under the surface. But now, I have gotten better. Much Better. So I went on another interview and another and found a job to fit me. My schedule. My personality and my needs. And as I take my lunch break today, I realize it was the best decision for my mental health needs.

D was not totally on board with this at first and didn’t quite understand. It is probably because he thinks I can do more. And I can, but sometimes simplicity is what one needs most. In a conversation with him the other night (many nights actually) he helped me to realize that I am going to have to demand more no matter what I am doing. So I quit my job as a result and accepted this one.

I learned though this experience and many others that I will continue to treat people kindly, but won’t allow them to operate in a crazy way. I will handle them within reason, vs in the past I would lose my crap after too much and start throwing things-true job story, haha. I was proud of the way way I handled the mistreatment on this last job, by speaking my truth and simply walking away.

I kinda love/hate Facebook but I saw this article today and it was pretty dope. We’ve all seen lists like this before but this one spoke to me.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1772719949539708&id=1339965909481783

So hopefully if you are going through a struggle: job, relationship, friendship or whatever, you will just be fabulous you and more importantly take care of you and your needs. And even though it may seem scary, step out on faith and know that God has a plan that is better than what you can imagine….

~simply

Dee