So, yeah. I’m gonna try doing this every Wednesday. Things on my mind, things I observe or just something I find curious, or my viewpoint on differing situations.
In today’s chapter of WWWW, I will discuss nature vs nurture and how fantastical it all is and strange.
So, I am currently nannying for twins. The girl: fiery, bossy, fun-loving, full of personality. Day 2 of being with her and she was in my lap to take her milk and watch Sesame Street. The boy: fearful, cautious, teary-eyed. They are both loved a lot by live-in grandparents and their mom. As a matter of fact, the little boy is doted on more because of his personality.
Why are they so different? I have observed them for 3 straight days and they could not be more opposite. In every single way. She grabs what she wants and he timidly takes whatever is left over. He cries at the drop of a toy and she giggles over Elmo’s voice. How could at this young age they have such marked personality differences?
They haven’t been around many people as they have stayed at home with grandma until I came along. Some people would make the argument that he is lacking something, had I not explained this all in detail. But he actually gets the most attention because he is not independent and is coddled much more.
So, nature seems to be the clear culprit here. People/beings are born with certain ways/tendencies, no matter what their story is. There are psychologists who would argue that this is not possible that likes/dislikes, fears, etc do not happen until there are multiple outside experiences and influences. Well this one scenario has already debunked that school of thought.
Another scenario- I adopted 2 kittens at 8 weeks old from a friend when I was a teen. One was: scared of life, I could barely pat her on the head and was a follower and timidly ate her food. The other was: rebellious (tore up things constantly), was loving and very domineering.
I got them at the same time. They were from the same litter. In this situation they were also the same sex. They both lived with me from a young age and were in a stable environment. Why so different? I was so young so it is not like I just spent tons of time with the bold cat, I saw them and nurtured them equally.
So again, nature wins. How is it possible with similar experiences and environments, animals in this case, could have such opposite personas? God has apparently wired us all different. Despite what many think, it can’t be solely related to nurture because I have 2 concrete examples and there are many more. You are probably thinking of similar situations.
This article https://www.workstyle.io/how-personality-develops
paints the picture that it can’t be nature alone and I can agree with that a bit. As we grow up, our experiences help to mold our personality, but read these words-it does not create it. At least in my opinion. And some psychologists are beginning to be members of both camps.
What do you think? I’m curious to know.
~simply
Dee
Nature vs Nurture is always interesting to me. You can never study one without the other, they will both always be there together. In some people, though, it seems nature has a greater influence but on others it can seem that nurture was the biggest influence. It just seems to vary.
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Yeah. I feel like most of us are prewired, at least personality wise, but man nurture makes a heck of a difference in everything!
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I’m with you on this one. I definitely have thought a lot about this. I have two sets of cousins (brothers)who both have two kids. Cousin 1 have a boy who is so easy going, laid back, cooperative. We all thought he was the result of great parenting. Their 2nd kid comes along and OMG he’s a wild one! He kept them on their toes, probably caused many frustrating moments, he was a toddler who grabbed their car keys and got in the car on his own to start it up. 🤦🏻♀️ Now he’s a teen and seems to be doing well and he’s a drummer. They moved away so I’m a bit out of touch now.
Cousin 2’s first kid was wild and disobedient and their 2nd kid- laid back, goes with the flow and seems pretty easy to manage. I’ve seen this in other families too.
There is something in our dna and brain chemistry that makes us how we are innately and then the environment can help shape us or hurt us depending on our circumstances. That’s what I think.🤷🏻♀️
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