So, I think the best way that I can explain decluttering is like a craving…

So, I am not sure if you are the ‘keep everything’ type or if you are like me, someone who desires to have order in their live or a stringent minimalist. I would love to be the last one, but I am just too freaking sentimental!! But I wake up sometimes thinking of how I can be better organized. Getting rid of clutter is like craving for pizza when I am eating kale. It just won’t go away until I am able to have what I desire. And right now, I desire organization and clarity! This morning my first thoughts were organizing pool/beach clothing. Not about how great life is or how blessed I am, but organizing swimsuits:)

I have this flat/apt/condo-it depends on where you live as to what you want to call it. It is cute. Ample bedrooms and bathrooms and a view of the pools from our patio, but the problem with 1000 sq feet is that it is not enough to hold the items of nostalgia and growing collection of things that my daughter can’t let go of. Another problem is, though our material items grow, the square footage stays the same.:) I have bins and bins of my daughter’s clothing. They are like cute pieces of history. The outfit from her first steps, her first through 6 birthdays, Halloween costumes, Christmas and Easter dresses and the list goes on. So, because I can’t part with those at this time, and may never get rid of them, I must rid our place of things that I just do not have a real attachment to.

Anyhow, I would keep everything that my mom or grandmother or loved one gave me. Even if it was an ugly blanket or rug or lamp, I would not get rid of it. I was given a love seat and kind of hated it, so I put it in another room so that I would not offend. After each move, I became less and less worried about giving away things gifted to me and then eventually told everyone that I was good and that I didn’t need any more “help” with setting up home. I also told my mom to stop buying me so much that I just didn’t have room for it. And each time I moved, my housing increased, so I just didn’t need to spend money on unnecessary stuff anymore. And honestly, I didn’t want to. I enjoyed having less things and I suddenly became more productive.

I moved 9 different times between 2001 and 2013. Three of those times were within in the same neighborhood, but it was still a move! After that first big move in 2001 from a house into an apartment, I realized I just had too much. It took 6 cars just to haul my clothes and shoes. Yeah, I was a shopper then! And my mom was too, so she bought me things a lot. This was before the grandchild came along.:) Before I gave my ex the boot, we had a place with an attached garage and a little storage hall that we could put luggage in and a Christmas tree, etc. Then we had room on each side to put decor and different things that weren’t used daily in nice stacks inside containers. I miss that garage, but sometimes I am glad that we don’t have it because my daughter and I would accumulate more.

When I got married and had a kid, I started to feel all bogged down again with stuff. It was because my ex had excess mounds of ridiculous crap. When he moved into my place that we lived together for 4 years, he had the largest moving truck the company could offer and it was full! Every time he would go away for the week for work, I would get rid of massive amounts of his stuff, and he never even noticed! Before I met this goof, he belonged to a car club and it was over and done with when he and I started dating. So why did he have boxes upon boxes of merch from a dead car club? I could see if he wanted one t-shirt and one flashlight. But he had 50 flashlights and 50 t-shirts. He was basically a hoarder in the making.

Besides the psychological and emotional clutter I had to deal with while being with this jerk, I had to deal with his excessive junk. I did not feel at ease at home because I could escape from the crap in the garage, but the closet was overflowing and the dresser was jammed. There was more clutter than I could deal with and it was affecting my creativity and productivity. When he left, I moved to a smaller place, and I again felt overwhelmed with things. So on a regular basis I would use my local Freecycleย and give bags of unused toys or clothes that my kid never wore. I also went to my credit union and gave bags of nice baby clothes to a teller with 2 young children who needed the help. I began to feel lighter and happier. Not just from shedding the items, but because I was helping others.

I am kind of back on this cleaning out tangent of sorts. It is partially because of the fact that it is time and because ML will move here at some point this year. The 3 of us will live together and I want to make room for his things and for it to be our home, not just mine. I want our stuff to mesh well together. So I have already decided what furniture I wont keep so that when we do merge, he doesn’t have to give up a lot. He is making a big leap to move away from an area he has lived forever, so I can sacrifice meaningless objects for him. I’m stoked because my guy is a huge clothes horse and is now doing well at parting with a lot of his things. I guess that some of my nagging rubbed off.:) Now we can join together and not only have a neat home, but a cohesive, healthy and fruitful existence in all of our endeavors.

~simply

Dee

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